Silence Please.

Ah could, likesay many people who woulda watched yestirday's fitba match, write aboot the perr, perr standard ay refereeing which nearly destroyed wha promised tae be one heck ay a gaim. But it is tae the credit ay the players that thay took all those shitein decisions oan the chin, and just played their fitba like thay wir supposed tae. It did manage to turn oot to be a classic, wi the man disadvantage just provin too much tae handle fir Arsenal as the clock ran doon. When Eto'o equalised in the 76th minit, it wis Gaim Oan... and when Belletti scored in the 81st, it wis Gaim Ovah. Barca wir Champions ay Europe.

As ah said, ah could write more aboot this. But ah'm not gaun tae. Instead, ah'm gaun to write aboot somethin which ah hiv noticed ovah the past... well, the past so many days whin ah huv not had college and therefore huv time to notice things. And ah'm gaun to borrow a line from Fight Club, 'cos that's essentially wha ah've noticed. It's only whin thay think you're dyin, do people actually listen tae ye. Otherwise, thay're just waitin fae thair turn tae speak.

Ah've lost all belief in the fact tha it takes two tae make a conversation. As far as ah ken see, the two perr sods just keep talkin aboot what they think is worth talkin aboot, fuck aw if it is ay no significance to wha the other person's sayin.Ye ken wha ah'm talkin aboot?
"So, he nivir eats junk food when he goes oan tae the beach or somewhere".
"Yeah, mah grades will come oot in a week or so."
"Is it? So we try tae tell im it's awright, he ken eat that stuff once in a while, but he nivir does."
"He he. Ye know, it's aways the even sem which pulls yer CG daun... Hope that I ken break the even sem jinx."
"Yeah, hope ye do. So, whin are yer grades comin?"

Ah'm no kiddin when ah say this is usually how maist conversations will go. And that tae me is just a perr waste of time, ay both the sods. Why no just say it in the face that yer no interested and git oan wi yer life? But that cannae be done either, cos then, ye woulnae huv anyone tae listen tae your stories. So they jist keep up the charade, two people actin interested in the other's perr, soddin life, while inwardly thinking Fuck All.

Which is why, ah decided to follow the Silence is Gaulden rule. Only whin ye want tae say something, you feel irritated and restless aboot the other person gaun oan n oan n no lettin ye git a word in. Instead, if ye nivir have anythin tae say, then there's no heartburn, ken what ah say? Ye wade intae the conversation with the supreme knowledge tha ye will no be able tae say anythin of any significance. So ye jist sit back into the recesses of yer mind, switch oaf yer thought process fir a while, and nod along or make appropriate Hmms and OKs as situation demands. This also helps in ending the conversation briefly, as there is only one story runnin and no two parallel ones. Once thay're done, ye nod and smile, shake paws if ye wantae, n go yer seperate ways.

Enjoy the Sound oaf Silence.